Ask the parenting pros
“Help! My kid has back-to-school nerves and isn’t sleeping!”
Late bedtimes. Big feelings. Endless water requests. If your child’s sleep is spiraling just as the school year ramps up, you’re not alone. The transition from summer’s relaxed rhythm to fall’s early mornings can wreak havoc on little sleep schedules—and emotional resilience.
The good news? Sleep consultant and licensed clinical social worker, Carla Perl, says with a few intentional shifts, families can restore calm—without turning bedtime into a nightly battle.
So, what’s a sleep-deprived, style-loving parent to do? Read this.
Action Plan:
Resetting Routines for a Restful School Year
Back-to-school stress can show up as bedtime resistance or middle-of-the-night wakeups. “When kids are stressed, a calming bedtime routine is more important than ever,” says Carla. Children thrive on predictability. Create a consistent wind-down period—bath, pajamas, brushing teeth, 2–3 short books, and a final cuddle—at the same time every night. If your child is anxious, build in a few extra minutes of connection. “Talk through tomorrow’s plan and let them share their worries. Just listen. Don’t rush to fix.”
It’s tempting to go from 9:30 p.m. summer nights to a strict 7:30 bedtime in one swoop. But research shows kids need time to adjust. “Start shifting bedtime earlier by 15 minutes every couple of nights,” Carla suggests. “And make sure mornings are aligned—sleeping in throws off the whole reset.” Not sure what bedtime your child needs? Carla’s downloadable sleep chart maps it by age and school start time.
A calm morning starts at bedtime. “When mornings are less hectic, kids feel more in control, and that makes it easier for them to fall asleep,” says Carla. Pack lunches, prep backpacks, and lay out clothes before bed. Kids who help prep feel more confident—and less likely to ruminate at night.
If your child is nervous about a new teacher or classroom, Carla says to meet those emotions with curiosity. “Listen without jumping in to solve everything. Then, role-play what they’re worried about—asking a question in class, saying hi to a new friend. Practicing helps them feel more confident.” For younger kids, visit the school or meet the teacher in advance. “Familiarity lowers anxiety,” Carla adds.
It’s easy to cave when your child begs for just one more book. But consistency helps kids feel safe. “Let them choose their books before starting the routine,” Carla says. “When reading time is done, calmly remind them it’s bedtime and they can read more tomorrow.” This might take a few nights, but kids adjust quickly when the routine stays the same.
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